Tuesday, April 26, 2005

pernah tak...? part 1

...urmmm pernah tak korang mengalami situasi macam nie....

tengah syok syok buat kerja kat opis (sebenarnya kepala otak ke lain tak focus pun)...ur hp berbunyi (dlm kes aku menyala nyala takde bunyi) ..berdebar debar...
dan kita tengok nombor yang tertera bukan lah nombor yang kita harap harapkan atau dlm erti kata lain yang dinanti nantikan...takpe kita jawab gak..SAHHHHH..orang lain yang kita dok tunggu panggilannya orang lain pulak yang menelepon..tetiba ajer kita jadik rimmmmasssssss sesangatttt..dan tertanya"asalll lah si polan nie yang call bukan si "dia"....??"
panggilan terputus, dan kita sedar yang orang yang buat kita rimas tue akan call balik..memang dia call balik pun..
adeihhhhhhh..so layanlah dlm tak layan....

sebenarnya ape yang aku nak luahkan kat sini aku tak nak jadi "pemanggil" atau "pengsms" yang buat orang lain rasa rimasss dengan panggilan aku atau sms aku yang aku pasti takan direply/ direspons sama sekali...
thts why aku lebih senang mensilentkan hp aku dari biar dia active berbunyi..sebab kalau aku activekan nada deringnya ako tau dia takan berbunyi sampai bila bila...dari aku frust sensorang baik aku let it be in silence mode!

ape lah aku merepek nie..???#$%^ hmmm never give up to take care abt others...
mau balik awal jumpa kengkawan..lotus bangsar..ahli kelab jiwa luka....

always

this morning I woke up and listened to my favourite song- "Always" by Bon Jovi.
It make my heart cried, I'm missing him so much.. no doubt!

I can't deny it or just pretend like it didn't happen.
...It keeps haunting me, I dream of him almost every nite

I can't ignore it by saying "Jess, it is not there, never was, and never will be"

...macam mana nie......?????
tapi aku agak agak dia dah "membersihkan" aku dari awal lagi!!


And I will love you, baby - Always
And I'll be there forever and a day - Always
I'll be there till the stars don't shine
Till the heavens burst and The words don't rhyme
And I know when I die, you'll be on my mind
And I'll love you - Always

Monday, April 25, 2005

...jiwa kacau

I've got fever on Saturday...lazy weekend with hopeless love story!!!(jess, I'm still missing him)
somehow I found out blogging is the cheapest 'therapy' for me to feel better...


What's Horoscope say today?
Now is not the time to take the easy way out, and you both (somewhere, deep down) know it. Thinking ahead like this isn't the most thrilling thing to do, but it is the smartest. Help each other be the smartest versions of yourselves possible.

my recent to do list:
+ change my hairstyle probably the hue
+ plan my outing to Redang in mid May
+ do monthly budgeting..is a must
+ buy some outstanding items 1,2,3...n wedding gift
+ going back to my home town, Ipoh
+ go fishing
+ set appointment for medical check up
+ meet him

Friday, April 22, 2005

"Pejam Matamu"

...i like this song, tapi tak sempat nak nyanyikan utk dia..so dengarkan okey!


Kau dan aku
Di waktu itu
Cuba meniti titian
Lalu tersungkur
Kita tertawa

Kini semuanya
Kenangan saja
Dan kita telah dewasa
Engkau pun berjaya
Aku di sini bhagia

Dulu engkau keseorangan
Kerna kealpaanmu
Oh... puncanya hilang arah tujuan

Bersama beriring
Melangkah seganding
Setiap detik kau tempuh(inya)
Dengan nafas kesungguhan

Dengar bisikku

Temanku
Genggam tanganku
Pejam sekejap matamu
Lihatlah cahaya menunggu

Gapailah setiap cita mu
Dan kenal isi kulit mu
Kan ada hidup yang baru

Yang satu

Bermula di sini
Takkan hilang nanti
Bersatu teman abadi
Kan terus sejati
Mencipta lagi memori

Thursday, April 21, 2005

neither...nor...

The game was finally over...I'm quit, leaving memories behind
suffice to say that being single is the best way out for me...


I knew he would depressed with my answer and he can expect final outcome from me,
it won't never ever be good...
I wanna hear he said to me this "...Semua terserah padamu aku begini adanya, kuhormati keputusanmu, apapun yang akan kau katakan"


I admit the impact was hurt and takes time to heal but life goes on! be tough honey...


...Bukan semua yang anda sangka membahagiakan itu benar2 membahagiakan.Bahagianya mungkin ada tapi deritanya juga datang sama. Semua benda, pasti ada baik buruknya.


cayang kolakola+honeydew+justea+bonsai yang comel(terbaru)...bye

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

"Waterfall LoVe"

I had fun and exciting activities last weekend. 15 - 17 April.. .Went on an excursion to Jerangkang Waterfall, Maran Pahang. Participated by 31 members from 4 different forum communities -MELAYU.COM (ORGANIZER), SIFOO.COM, ROYALBUTTERFINGERS & MESRA.NET. It was indeed such a pleasant trip although Im totally out of energy after trekking for 4 hours…
tough + challenging + slick trail to uphill.


We were lucky because weather was on our side and those programs run smoothly as per schedule...swimming, enjoy the beautiful scenery of jerangkang, taking photo etc

I would like to express my appreciation to all my friends, crew members that shown tremendous commitment and passion towards this outing. I definitely will be missed our sweet memories over there!!!

Jerangkang Fun Fact:
+ nangis dlm bas masa sepanjang perjalanan pegiii..UuUUu (12:15 am – 3:15am)~tak sabar sabar nak bercamping
+ pergi air terjun tapi tak mandi!! FRUST GILER-emergency case
+ lagu tema dan tag line yang pasti buat ako tersengeh..LA..LA..LA..LA..LA..LA..LA..LA(original version p.ramlee)
"acungkan 3 jari.."ROCK lah konon
+ first time bercamping and tido dlm tent..sejok..sejok
+ naik 4WD…a.ka. lori..hehehe
+ yang ader dekat dekat tapi jauhhhh sangat rasanyer

+ ending yang sweet :)) u knw tht!

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

11.5 hours

..I overslept last nite for almost 12 hours...dozed off around 8:30pm and woke up at 8:00am this morning
rushing like hell and late for work again!

getting fed up with OJ and those "generated code"!!!!
I'm not in the mood at all...................................
tired+empty+missing him so much

Thursday, April 07, 2005

Undelivered message...

It's hard to update my blog recently since internet being curb by management. I'm not sure how often I manage to write in here... could be once a week.

Yesterday, as usual I met my close GF: Op, Anim, Dea, Wina and Mimi. I was so glad to meet Mimi after a while. We talked abt a lot of things last nite and encouraged Mimi to participate in the upcoming Malaysian Idol's audition. Mimi got a talent to be singer as she being gifted with such a lovely voice....go ..go ..go... Mimi!!

At that moment of time also, I felt sad and frustrated after received one message. He couldn't turn up and I realize that he getting started to build a barrier between us! I'm sorry if I did something wrong.
However, I still praying for his happiness and hope thing will get better one day.

******************************************
Biarkanlah resah sayang
Sukar ku lalui
Buat ku berduka
Kenangkanlah oh semalam
Walau cinta dikunci
Janji tak ku lupa

Tak daya ku halangi
Tak ku cuba jauhi
Tetap di sini
Terus menanti

Ikrar kita mengharungi badai sakti
Mencari sinar kasih suci
Walaupun nafas ku ini pasti terhenti
Jangan pula ada sangsi lubuk hati
Percaya cinta tiada ganti
Kau yang ku cari
Kaulah kasih ke akhir hayat nanti